Tag: Relationships

Namaqualand | Relationships | Value

I heard a beautiful story about a widower who went to Namaqualand following the death of a lover. The trip of mourning, grief and reflection turned out to be so much more than a farewell, as the trip resulted in love found once more. There are times when we think that we have lost love forever; failed relationships and death are amongst the chains we put on our minds and hearts. But sometimes, these events lead you to Namaqualand, where, once you have found peace, you will be presented a bright yellow Namaqualand flower to carry with you for the rest of your life. Think about it: you will break up with every person you go out with, except for one. And even after death, love is not lost. The story was told out of the perspective of sadness for a relationship that withered and had run its course, and the storyteller joked that a Namaqualand flower is waiting for her. And she is absolutely right – there is a Namaqualand flower waiting for her; and she is the Namaqualand flower that someone else has been waiting for. It is through patiently waiting that we will be presented the perfect flower.

Personally, I believe that everything happens for a reason; that we are placed in certain people’s lives for a reason and that certain people are placed in our lives for a reason. Life is a classroom of continuous learning. Most of us have a yearning to spend our lives adventuring with someone like-minded; and God has chosen a Namaqualand flower for each of us. We just need to wait actively, patiently and with content.

It also made me think about a thing that has pressed on my heart for some time now: the fact that we sometimes fall into the trap of finding our value and worth from external sources. Sometimes we define ourselves either consciously or subconsciously by the things of this world. Many times I feel worthy or valuable only when I perform well and when I am praised for my performance. People crave attention and fame – thinking that being a Hollywood star will add to their value or worth as a person. Other people find their worth and value in money – having more than others automatically make them feel superior. Other people crave power – the ability to control and to manipulate outcomes. Most of these things: performance, money and power, aren’t inherently bad things, but we often try to find our value in these things. There is a risk that performance, money and power is the things that we end up living for.

Another subconscious source of value and worth is the value or worth that we think comes from the partners in our relationships. Ultimately, another person can never increase your value as a person. No external source can provide you with value and worth.

So where does your value and worth come from? Your value and worth was deposited inside you when you were created. God had created you with immense value and worth, worth and value that nobody can ever take away from you or tell you that you don’t have. We were all created in the image of God. Meaning that all of us (white, black, Indian, poor, rich, atheist, Muslim, Christian, all 8 billion humans on earth) have an amazing amount of value that emanates from an internal source. Understanding the source of a person’s value is a game changer and it swings open the doors of grace.

God has chosen the perfect Namaqualand flower just for you, long before you were even born. Our Father knows what we need even before we ask for it.



In grief and sadness
We let go of lovers lost
Lovers taken away,
Lovers who walk away


Time and careful reflection
Will point the direction
To a dusty desert where soon
Wild yellow flowers will bloom


It is in the dry and arid dust
Where your flower shoots
Through earth’s tough crust
Shaking off soul’s dusty soot


In truth, a flower has been chosen
Specially for your hand
Until the ends of your days:
A dual light to find your way


Time and peaceful reflection
Will show the direction
To a dusty desert where soon
Wild yellow flowers
Abundantly will bloom
Providing the gift
Of a pre-ordained lover:
A lover for your soul’s Spring